If I were to answer this question honestly, I would say yes! But then again, maybe I haven't been conversing with the right people, I really don't know! one thing I do know tho, is that the world has become very "chatty"...too many social networks and not enough social networking (did that make sense? Hehe...dunno).

You find that a person will be very "loud" and hyper in a chat, oya bring the person to stand in front of you, problem! You both start fiddling with your phones or twiddling your thumbs (in the case of dead phone batteries) and searching every corner of your brain for a topic to discuss.
Chatting is exactly what it means, just having a chat, that most times (say 90% of the time) never has depth...

Okay, here's a typical chat (at least from my experience):
A: Hello!
B: Hi

A: how are you doing?/ How's your day going?
B: Fine

A: So what you up to?
B: nothing

**assuming the person cares enough to ask "you?"**

A: Nothing much either
B: Okay cool

A: Cool
B: ...

Depending on your relationship with said person, some extra information may be shared, some jokes cracked, compliments paid. Oh, and I do not exempt myself from this at all oh! I am completely guilty of this act as well *hides face*

Don't even get me started on those that claim to like you and want to "toast" hear questions like "what are your hobbies?" What?? Am i filling out a high school slum book? "what are your likes and dislikes?" ugh! This one gets me straight in my heart...with a dagger! "Have you eaten? What did you eat? so you didn't keep my own for me shey?"  This conversation actually "happened" to me... after telling me I didn't keep his share of MY food for him, he went ahead to accuse me of being selfish, and just to indulge him, i agreed that i was selfish...dear brethren and sistren, you won't believe what came out of this guys mouth next "you are selfish abi? so how many fish did you sell today?" Ewoooooo *puts hand on hed* say i was in shock is putting it mildly! Who in this day and age... *sigh*

But really! Is conversation dead? Has the virtual world dummed social life down so much that we can barely hold a conversation? Have we gotten so used to the 140 characters twitter offers that we unconsciously limit ourselves?

There are many times I crave an actual conversation, yes CRAVE! The kind were when you're done talking you feel refreshed and invigorated, the kind where at the end of it, you've laughed, you've goofed around, you've argued and most of all, you've learnt!

Be spontaneous in your conversations (no! not nasty), ask random questions (please not "so what are you wearing?" unless you both are cool like that), get the other person thinking, find out what you can learn from the person...for once, put down that smartphone (unless the conversation is happening via IM) log off twitter and facebook and snapchat and'll be surprised how much you'll learn about yourself if you have an actual conversation with an actual (not virtual) person...

What's your take on conversation and chatting and how it affects us? Do you disagree with my points? Do you have anything to add? Experiences to share? Oya let's gist!

Image source 1, source 2

You Might Also Like

14 thoughts

  1. I agree with you Aby. Sometimes it's the fear of not knowing what to say, trying to be cool, trying to sound in a certain way that makes it difficult for us to communicate..,..i'm guilty of this too, but i'm already trying to fix it.

  2. Here is a case between lol, kk and the likes, thanks for killing our conversations. But truth be said, I don't think anything is more "gayer" than a guy telling a guy kk in a chat, guys desist. Plus here is a quick fix to our Shallow chats and in time too.

  3. Hehehehe! Chat 101..Nice post, hope I'm not sounding like them already?? Well, it takes two to chat, some people makes it utterly impossible to chat with them. We're learning everyday, I guess i'll stop asking what one ate in my chats :D I enjoyed this post!

  4. Kenneth Iguodala6/20/2014 10:25:00 pm

    There's absolutely nothing wrong with "virtual" conversations. What's wrong is the way and manner it's done. We try to shorten the things we type thinking it means we are stylish and quick at texting (it's actually rude, disgusting, and proves we have a petty command of whatever language we are typing in). I'm actually at the point where I want to stop talking to humans (and maybe try dogs).

  5. Kenneth Iguodala6/20/2014 10:32:00 pm

    There's absolutely nothing wrong with "virtual" conversations. What's wrong is the way and manner it's done. We try to shorten the things we type thinking it means we are stylish and quick at texting (it's actually rude, disgusting, and proves we have a petty command of whatever language we are typing in). I'm actually at the point where I want to stop talking to humans (and maybe try dogs).

  6. I agree with you on this one. The way people just think they can wake up in the morning and start pinging and asking dumb questions like 'did you dream about me?' 'Did you pray 4 me in church? What are you wearing? Those kind of convos,I just end chat. Me that I get bored easily. But nice post *winks*. My blog misses you already *sad face*

  7. Nice post, but I 30% disagree with you on this. First time here!

  8. Girl!! I was going to tell you about how your comment about me being bubbly made me warm inside and then this your post hit me. I totally agree. I also got the "Have you eaten or should i come and cook for you?" bit just last week, i mean c'mon! I didn't even bother replying. You live in another state, I've known you for like 9 years and you think asking me that is cute?? Puleaseeee! Do better!

    I also do the "ai, cools" type convo when I'm not in the mood to chat for long. Good conversations are so hard to find these days and it;s a darn shame. SMH

  9. I love this post but I love your new header more. Hehe

  10. I love to have real conversations, I get tired when a person writes k or uses smiley.
    I agree with u, great write-up.

  11. Conversation isn't dead, there's just an exponential rise of "conversation serial killers" that make it statically look like convo is dead. Yall'll agree with me that, the sample chat miss purple used on this post can never happen between 2 straight guys, therefore the death of convo starts with boy trying to talk to girl via chats! Obviously he doesn't know her well, and like Ugo ukam said, there is d fear of not knowing what to say.

    So if a girl doesn't want to hear all that bother like Toinlicious,how about trying to start up a more reasonable convo and see how it goes, I mean it is a 2 way thing you know, unless of course she hates his guts then why start the chat @ all?

    Also, abbreviation of words and short versions of sentences ain't all that bad in chatting, However, you cannot do that when starting a convo with someone for the 1st time.One has to get some basic understanding of the other before embarking on "project shorthand". See, I use "convo" cos I knw y'all knw wat am saying however, the 1st time I used the word in this very long comment it was d full version. (I'm just saying).

    Some other times it's just laziness to keep pressing those keys on your keypad that's the problem. I know the number of times miss purple have had to quit chatting with me to make a call instead, cos her thumbs hurt! That is a way better thing to do than to abbreviate everything till it's meaning is lost! The sooner we all start to see that how we sound when we chat, reflects on our intellect as well as attitude the faster conversation murderers will stop emerging and conversation will, if I must say, rise again!

    1. Well said. Communication is a two way traffic but those "have you eaten" questions weakens me especially when it becomes regular. Those stereotyped chats too annoy me.

  12. Lol @Sumaina.. You got a point there, a strong point actually

  13. Yup!...I got something to share...I kinda think that maybe (just maybe) you have been conversing with the wrong people...See...communication is a two-way street....You can't be chatty if the person next to you is quiet....and you can't be quiet if the person next to you is chatty...Yes social media is a place to meet lots of people and stuff buh it is not a place for REAL wanna have a REAL conversation?...pick up the phone and hook up......people who kinda bury themselves in the virtual world of social media (to me) are people who have got very less going on in the real world...then again...I wouldn't judge media has its perks...hell!....some people met their husbands/wives in that virtual world and it became a reality for nope...I don't agree with you on the fact that 'conversation is dead'....I think some people found a better way to communicate based on their kind person.....buh I will agree with you on some silly questions people don't ask me if I have eaten if you haven't cooked for you think manna falls in my house or something?...hello mamacita..


Thank you for stopping by, you rock!
Please don't leave without sharing your thoughts/opinions in the comment box :) I'm itching to know what you have to say.